Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Conspiracy

The Government of Karnataka is conspiring against me. Honestly, no illusion this.

I ride my bike without a helmet. It’s been this way ever since I got to know my bike. I like the rush of wind in my hair. I enjoy the stabs of raindrops on my face. I love the caress of nature - and would not let anything come between us. That is until now.

Guess the Government of Karnataka does not like to see me happy. So it brought in a legislation stating that starting 1st September, Sameer Jain will have to put on a helmet will riding his two-wheeler. Alright, not in as many words - they said a helmet was mandatory for all two-wheelers riders. But I am sure this directive was prompted by my state of pure joy without the helmet.

Three days before the deadline (28-Aug), I reluctantly ride to the marketplace to purchase one. Even as I am nearing the helmet shop, I discover that the approach street has been made a one-way; so I am forced to make a turn (Conspiracy #1). I lose my way in the process, but eventually manage to make find the shop and get a helmet. On the way back, a garbage truck suddenly appears in front of me (Conspiracy #2). All the foul smell gets stuck between the visor of the helmet and my face. Yuck! I am behind the truck like forever. When I finally break free and zoom past the smelly monster, it starts to rain. One minute it is bright and sunny, and the next moment it begins to pour ... are you starting to see a pattern here? (Yes, conspiracy #3). So now I have to deal with a mud-spray from the wheels of bus in front. After a while, the rain vanishes as mysteriously as it appeared. Out of the blue, a woman pokes her head out of the bus window and launches a vomit waterfall (Conspiracy # 4 ... I am losing count here). I try to hide behind the bus to avoid her puke missile. I finally reach my destination, content that I was not subjected to any other scheme.

The next morning (29-Aug), the headlines in Times of India read - "Government suspends helmet legislation indefinitely".

5 Comments:

Blogger KG said...

Sad
Welcome to Banglore

4:27 AM  
Blogger Freedom said...

A true consultant(tech) begins to think about coding only after the requirement docs are approved and signed off. Till then, dont even bother to look at the specs. He begins the actual build not earlier than the final delivery date.
Can you guess why?....

In your case, the funky was at the receiving end of what he is used to doing.
Tough luck!

7:52 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Sir...seems Blore has 'bangalored' u....

6:00 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

donno why it has to happen with u!!!

5:42 AM  
Blogger yk said...

So Sad Sameer..I can imagine the irritation.

10:24 AM  

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